I will update later with how I climbed out of my depression and what I experienced but in short I took my meds.

Now I have a final in about 25 mins. I have never been so anxious in a loooooong time. I was pacing...I am shaking...etc etc. I literally feel on the verge of a panic attack. I finally resorted to taking some Serax (anti-anxiety med). I mean I cannot put into words my anxiety right now. I hope that this shit kicks in within these 25 mins. I'm trying to distract myself by writing this but my hands are shaking so damn bad that I can barely type. UGH! My breathing is pretty fast and I'm feeling dissociated. Gotta ground myself. Feel the keyboard...look at my hands...feel the blanket...deep breaths....hear the tv....wiggle my toes...run my finger up my leg...close my eyes...feel the rise and fall of my stomach and chest...move my neck side to side...I'll be okay...I'll be okay...I'll be okay.

Now think positve...I will do fabulous on my final. I will pass. I will not have a "freak out" and forget everything. I have studied. I will do great! I will remember everything that I studied. I will be okay...okay...okay.

Alright my heart rate is coming down. I'm getting back in touch with reality. I don't know if it's writing this and grounding or if my Serax is kicking in. Or a combination of both. I really don't know how long it takes Serax to work.

Alright it's now 11:13. I will get ready leave, be there early. Okay, wish me luck. I CAN DO THIS!!!